Life Lessons for a Fresh Start: Insights from Experience
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Chapter 1: Reflections on Life's Journey
What might my life look like if I could apply all the insights I’ve gained over sixty years? I consider myself fortunate compared to many of my childhood friends.
Professionally, I have thrived as an optometrist, adhering to my principles and high ethical standards. My personal life has been equally fulfilling; after more than forty years of marriage, I still cherish my husband. Although we’ve faced challenges, it’s crucial to work together, just like rowing in a canoe in unison.
In terms of finances, let's skip the details since that's not what you're here for.
My initial thought when writing this piece was that increased self-confidence would be my first piece of advice. However, I realized that if I had read this in my twenties, it would have frustrated me. "Be confident" sounds simple, but it’s far more complex in practice.
To truly advance, you must identify your values. While setting goals is important, understanding your principles is equally vital. There’s nothing worse than reaching a summit only to find you’re unhappy, or worse, realizing that your partner is on a different peak altogether. It's tough to share joy when you're both on separate mountains. Being aware of your values is key to enjoying the journey and knowing if you're on the right track.
Regularly reassess to ensure you're aligned with your values as you pursue your goals.
Remember, goals evolve, but values remain constant and will enhance your experience. Set small, attainable goals just outside your comfort zone and repeat the process. This method builds self-confidence over time.
Embrace the journey rather than fixating solely on the destination.
Emotional Intelligence vs. Intellectual Intelligence
In my era, intellectual intelligence was prioritized, while emotional intelligence was an unfamiliar concept. The early 1990s saw Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer establish a model centered on emotional skills, later popularized by David Goleman in his 1995 book.
Having read numerous psychology texts to enhance my happiness, I now see the immense value in developing emotional intelligence. Investing in self-improvement is never a regret.
Trusting My Instincts
The third lesson naturally follows from the previous two. I wish I had listened to my inner voice more often. My analytical nature often led me to overthink rather than trust my instincts.
When you leave your home and wonder if you should take a jacket, the answer is simple: if in doubt, grab it. That’s instinct!
Base your decisions on your own cues, not those imposed by friends or family. Self-discovery through diverse experiences and reflection is the best approach to understanding yourself.
Final Thoughts
If I’m able to share these insights today, it’s because I navigated my past as best I could. Were I to start over now, I would focus on these improvements to become a better version of myself. This would undoubtedly enrich my writing as well.
Who knows? Had I known these lessons earlier, I might not have become the person I am today.
In conclusion, here’s a summary of what I’ve learned:
- Take small steps to build self-confidence.
- Cultivate your emotional intelligence.
- Learn to recognize and trust your instincts.
P.S. I would have also made more time for writing!
Thank you for taking the time to read my reflections.
The first video shares valuable insights on how to start fresh in life at any stage, emphasizing the importance of self-reflection and growth.
The second video addresses the challenges and strategies for starting over from scratch, offering guidance for those in need of a new direction.
Francine Boilard is the author of Phrenssynnes’ blog. I invite you to explore my articles, which aim to bring a smile to your face and help you embrace life with positivity.